Your Sorted guide, Karen Paritee

For 45 years (not a typo), I banged my head against the same question: “Why can’t I do better when I know better?” And I did know better. That’s why I tried everything. Books. Programs. Willpower. I self-loved. I progress-tracked. I affirmed. I promised promised promised.

And for what? More bargaining. More bracing. More begging: Please let this be the last time.

What Changed

I finally realized: I wasn’t sabotaging. I was trying to stay whole. I was struggling because getting what I wanted was going to cost me what I also wanted. (Who’s raising her hand for that??)

Before I saw myself with that clarity, I used to eat Doritos-and all kinds of their kind-before I got my coat off, trying to make up for yet another day in paradise. Then one day, I found myself freezing them. (WTF??)

Not because I couldn’t be trusted-but because I could. (Me. Karen D. Paritee??) Because eating them felt… optional. (??) So much so that I had to freeze something with a military-grade shelf life to keep them fresh??

The journey to that moment-when self-trust was no longer the sticking point-felt like something worth talking about-with women who are tired of how it feels and what it costs to build entire systems around not trusting themselves with themselves. With women who are tired of dragging around the weight of the “I shoulds” and “I shouldn’ts.” Tired of feeling torn between what they want-and what they also want.

A View from the Other Side

You’re the opposite of being your “problem.” You’ve been trying to move forward without giving up what also matters. That’s not “sabotage.” That’s devotion. Logical. Not “pathological.” And seeing that changes everything.

Why I Built Sorted

I built Sorted for the woman who’s tired of managing herself like a liability. Who’s tired of trying to out-discipline her self-doubt. Who wants to feel safe with herself—and at home in her own mind.

(Ok.ok. I built Sorted because… I mean… have you seen you?? I have. I do. And I know our community will be even that much better with women who think like you among us. Un-misery loves company, too. 😉)

Sorted doesn’t ask you to give up what you want to get what you also want. That costs too much and never pays off. It shows what’s always been true: you and the person you want to be -are the same person. (And if that is true, what else is true?)

It may feel like your actions contradict what you want.

But aligning exactly with who you already are is how you deliver what you want and what you also want-and see that you’re already in the kind of relationship with yourself that checks all your boxes.

Come as you are. So you can leave how you want to be.

(And not even you’ll be able to stop you.)